It’s been awhile since I publicly wrote about defining and implementing Enough.
I have a lot more thoughts to share in the 2+ years it’s been, but I wanted to first write about how interesting it was to me to look back and see the breadcrumbs – so to speak – that led me to where I’m at.
One of the massive benefits of writing is that it helps clarify your thoughts. “How can I know what I think until I read what I write?” is something I deeply resonate with. (Side note: often credited to EM Forster, the original source of that quote is debated.)
Another benefit is that over time, it serves as a Chronicle of sorts.
Shortly after I started writing here, I wrote about the time that I actually numbered my days. It helped me realize just how fleeting life is. It’s an exercise I’d encourage anyone to do, as it’s amazing the perspective it can give us. (May 2019)
Those thoughts led me indirectly to reflecting on the different types of Time – Chronos vs Kairos. The Greeks used two different words for the English version of “time.” I wanted to focus more energy and intention in living a Kairos lifestyle vs a Chronos one. (May 2019)
Running down that same string of thought, I then wrote about what Legacy I would want to leave behind. Not the financial type – but the emotional, relational, impact type of Legacy. What did I want those who knew me the best to remember about me? And to be clear – I have no ambitions or expectations for books to be written about me, or places to be named after me. When I think Legacy, I think of those immediately surrounding me. (June 2019).
Then I reflected on the Money Value of Time, vs the Time Value of Money. While as a financial advisor I totally get the latter, the former was something of a new twist. Time doesn’t necessarily equal money. Time is far more valuable than money simply because time is non-renewable. (June 2019)
That led to reflecting on the delicate see-saw balance of living in Today vs Tomorrowland. My industry spends a ton of time and effort and resources talking about Tomorrow. But too few of us talk about living in Today at the same time. (July 2019)
A good friend of mine – Taylor – read that post and sent me The Family Board Meeting book. It remains perhaps one of the most influential books I’ve read to date. It provides a stark framing and reminder that we only get 18 summers with each one of our kids. (August 2019)
After listening to another good friend on the Kitces podcast and hearing a phrase he used, I started reflecting on “What is getting the BEST of me?” Where is the majority of my energy going to every day? And is that in line with what I want? (September 2019)
That led to me redefining what “Success” meant to me, personally. I ended up paraphrasing someone else and defined it as “Being respected the most by those who know me the best.” It’s quite easy to put on a public façade and look amazing to the masses who don’t know us well. It’s quite another thing of who we are to those who know us the best. (October 2019)
The $50 Family Fable was then shortly introduced to me. It remains a fable that breaks my heart when I think about it, or when I recently reread it. I realized there were some serious inconsistencies in my life with what I said was important to me, and what I showed was important to me. (November 2019)
Reflecting on what the term “Grow” means – I wrote about the idea of Growing Small for the first time. This was the first time – in retrospect – I started specifically talking about Enough without actually naming it. The idea of growth meaning “to become gradually or increasingly” resonated, and the concept of “perma-growth” was first introduced. (December 2019)
I re-read a book – for the 4th time – and started reflecting more on a Barometer of Busyness in my life. Specifically, a way of gauging our busyness in life is asking ourselves “How much do I care about the things I care about? Or more powerfully – how little?” (January 2020)
And then I publicly stated for the first time that I was implementing Enough. Specifically, this meant for me not growing my firm’s household count anymore. I was intentionally going to stay small. (January 2021).
Again, it’s fascinating to me to see the breadcrumbs at play here. I didn’t know for sure that I would end up capping my clients when I first launched Fident. But writing – in this case publicly – chronicled the lead up, without any intention on my end in doing so. When I look back at these old articles, I can see “Enough” hanging out in the background, but never stepping out into the main light – nor ever specifically identified.
On top of serving as a fascination, looking back also helps me see just how much MORE the idea of Enough isn’t denominated nor driven by dollars. It’s not about the financial side of things nearly as much as it is about the intangibles in life.
Enough is less of a destination and more of a realization.
And these breadcrumbs are still helping me realize this.